Becoming a parent for the first time is many things. It’s exciting, tiring, joyful, fascinating and a time full of love.
But it’s also hard. Really hard.
Every new parent, at some time or other, has days when they just want to hit pause and take a few hours away. The challenges of having a newborn in the house are all consuming, and it’s completely normal to feel overwhelmed.
So why don’t more people talk about it? That’s exactly what mom of three Jordan Harrell thought as she juggled the demands of three young children.
So Jordan decided to take to Facebook to share some words of encouragement with other moms. Her message is definitely worth sharing.
“I went 0 for 3 on easy babies,” Jordan writes in her Facebook post, which has since been shared nearly 2000 times.
“There was a lot of colic and crying and ear infections and food allergies and little-to-no sleep.
My tubes are tied, just in case you’re wondering how much I loved it.
During those years of long nights (and long days), there was LOTS of crying. There were a few nights I wasn’t sure I could take it anymore. I wanted it to stop and told the baby as much. They never listened.”
Felt like a failure
Like many moms, Jordan blamed herself for being unable to soothe her babies.
“A lot of those nights, I felt like such a failure. THREE hard babies? That seems illogical. Surely, the common denominator is their flipping ill-equipped mother. That would make more sense.
But during those moments of questioning my mommy-fitness, I would think back to a story my mom had told me.
She was a young mom with her first baby, my brother, who was, you guessed it, HARD. He was colicky and clingy. He only wanted my mom and never slept.
Words of wisdom
“One Sunday morning at church, baby Justin started crying mid-service. My mom quickly made the long walk to the back of the church to calm him down in the nursery.
Sitting next to her in the other rocking chair was another mom, a baby laying against her chest about the same age as Justin. He sat nuzzled peacefully against her, not a peep out of him, even as Justin screamed at the top of his lungs.
“What’s your secret? How is he so easygoing?” my mother half-joked, half pleaded.
The woman explained that the baby was actually not her biological child. He was a foster child.
“‘He just spent the first few months of his life crying non-stop with no response. Nobody ever came. The crying didn’t work for him. So he stopped. And now, he never cries’,” the woman explained.
“‘Your son’s crying is a good thing. It means he trusts you, trusts that you’ll come.'”
Jordan has kept that woman’s words close to her heart during all the tough nights with her children.
“His crying is a good thing.
He’s crying because he knows I’ll answer.
So to the mamas of hard babies, be thankful for the crying. Go scoop them up and hold them close.
They’re not crying because you’re a bad mom.
They’re crying because you’re such a good one.”
I went 0 for 3 on easy babies. There was a lot of colic and crying and ear infections and food allergies and…
Talk about words to live by! As parents, we’re all very hard on ourselves. Don’t forget to take some time to remind yourself that you’re doing an incredible job!
Share this article with a parent who needs to know that they’re doing a fantastic job!
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