With that, the professor takes his phone out of his pocket, puts it on speaker, and dials a random number. “Hello, may I please speak to Dave?” says the professor when the other person answers. ...
A woman takes her 16-year-old daughter to the doctor. The doctor says, “Okay, Mrs. Jones, what’s the problem?” The mother says, “It’s my daughter Mandy. She keeps getting these cravings, she’s putting on weight and ...
God says, “Your request is very materialistic. Think of the logistics of that kind of undertaking. The supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific! The concrete and steel it would take! I can ...
The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, “You Can Be The Man Of Your House.” He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, “From now on, you need to know ...
A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again… She put an ad in the local newspaper that read: “Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must ...
Teacher: “If I gave you two cats and another two cats and another two, how many would you have?” Johnny: “Seven!” Teacher: “No, listen carefully… If I gave you two cats, and another two cats and another two, ...
In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand. He approached her and asked; “Mrs. Jones, do you know me?” She responded, “Why, yes, I do know ...